Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Office Talk



A few days ago, I continued my losing battle against the slow murder of the English language, in this post, entitled On A Go-Forward Basis I Fucking Hate You 2.0.

While I never worked it into the post, I stumbled upon a rage-worthy nugget while "researching" that post which I wanted to share with my readers and fellow language protectors given some of the enthusiasm that has shown up in the comments section of that post for no reason at all.

In the course of trying to find more stabtastic language to include in my harangue, I Googled the phrase "Office Talk" and stumbled upon the website for the Microsoft product of that same name. Seemingly with no sense of irony given the name of the product, Microsoft includes the following jargon-y blurb on that website to describe the product:

The goals of OfficeTalk are to understand scenarios enabled by a microblogging platform and to gather data to help inform future Microsoft efforts focused on microblogging.

What the fuck does that mean?

Well, from what I can tell it pretty much just means "facebook for your office."

And, as if that weren't bad enough, they even have a tab that's marked "Envisioning."

A tab! I'm sure a lot of people are like, oh, here's the "contact us" info, yeah, but where can I get some more info on "Envisioning."

Ah! Here's the "Envisioning" tab.

Jesus.



The lead picture popped up when I did a Google image search for the word "Envisioning." I can't say for sure, but I have a feeling he might be one of the web designers at Microsoft responsible for the Office Talk site.

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